^ Lol! That made me giggle so bad!!
Thanks for posting so many funnies, you guys! ^_^ _________________ Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was
really pissed.
She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the
driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!"
The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke
up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box
gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.
Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought
the box back in the house.
She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.
Bob has been missing since Friday
-----------------
A man takes his bath tub back to the store complaining it leaks.
The assistance says to the man "well did you put the plug in?"
The man replies outraged "YOU DIDN'T TELL ME IT WAS ELECTRIC!!!
--------------
A gamer's prayer:
Our father, who art so l33t
admin be thy name.
Thy pings will come,
thy will be done,
on dust as it is in office.
Give us this day our daily frags,
And forgive us our TKs as we forgive those who TK against us.
And lead us not into boredom,
but deliver us from n00bage.
For thine is the bandwidth, the server, and the pwnage.
for ever and ever
W00T!!! _________________ Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
Our father, who art so l33t
admin be thy name.
Thy pings will come,
thy will be done,
on dust as it is in office.
Give us this day our daily frags,
And forgive us our TKs as we forgive those who TK against us.
And lead us not into boredom,
but deliver us from n00bage.
For thine is the bandwidth, the server, and the pwnage.
for ever and ever
W00T!!!
Hahaha, I like this.
EDIT: Not sure if this is funny but I'll just say it nevertheless. If there is one person in the world who I would turn gay for, it would probably be Albert Einstein. Who wouldn't?
A farmer and his wife went to a fair. The farmer was fascinated by the airplanes and asked a pilot how much a ride would cost.
"$10 for 3 minutes," replied the pilot.
"That's too much," said the farmer.
The pilot thought for a second and then said, "I'll make you a deal. If you and your wife ride for 3 minutes without uttering a sound, the ride will be free. But if you make a sound, you'll have to pay $10."
The farmer and his wife agreed and went for a wild ride. After they landed, the pilot said to the farmer, "I want to congratulate you for not making a sound. You are a brave man."
"Maybe so," said the farmer, "But I gotta tell ya, I almost screamed when my wife fell out."
-------------------------
A man has 3 daughters. The man is reading his paper in his easy chair when
one of his daughters walks up and says "Daddy, why am I named Rosebud?" The man
replied "Because when you were born a little rosebud fell on your forehead." The
little girl walked off.
Another little girl walks up and says "Daddy, why am I named Dandelion?" The
man said "Because when you were born a little dandelion fell on your forehead."
The little girl walked off.
The third little girl walks up and starts to babble like a retard, and the
man said "Shut up, Anvil!"
--------------
Top ten excuses for falling asleep at your desk:
1 "They told me at the blood bank this might happen."
2 "I wasn't sleeping, I was trying to pick up contact lens without hands."
3 "I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning
a new paradigm!"
4 "Amen"
5 "This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in the last time
management course you sent me to."
6 "Whew! Guess I left the top off the liquid paper"
7 "I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work related stress."
8 "This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!"
9 "Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won't wear off!"
10 "Darn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our
biggest problem." _________________ Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was
really pissed.
She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the
driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!"
The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke
up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box
gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.
Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought
the box back in the house.
She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.
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